背景介绍
申请院校：Yale University
申请专业：BA, Political Science and Government
Personal Statement
Looking back, I feel pretty bad for Wendy.
谁是Wendy？过去发生了什么？为什么作者对Wendy感到愧疚？
申请者可以借鉴作者在开头就抛出一个hook，新颖有趣。
All she’d done was play dodgeball with me at camp-but she had talked to me (at least briefly) and had cute freckles. Based solely on this, I determined that I was uncompromising, head-over-heels in love, and that my ten-year-old soul had found its perfect match.
开头一段作者情窦初开小故事，引出了上文的Wendy。What，Where，Who and When，四个W被寥寥两句话描述的生动又有趣，从这一段就可看出作者对各类词汇的使用可谓是炉火纯青。
作者对细节的充满故事性的描写以及head-over-heels这类生动词汇的运用值得借鉴。促使招生官兴致盎然地往下读。
I decided to write her a love poem, a cascade of free-verse compliments meant to showcase the breadth and depth of my undying affection, and to show off my wit and compassion. I had just read Romeo & Juliet, so I was on a roll, churning out metaphor after grandiose metaphor about her freckles.
一见钟情后，作者则准备采取行动表达自己对Wendy的爱意，写诗。文字是作者擅长且自信的优势，这一段尤甚。第一句就可感受其文字之美，因此可联想到作者给Wendy情书的美好，招生官也会被这些文字感染，不由自主地进入作者勾勒的诗的世界。后边一句作者提到其研读Romeo & Juliet，而当时的作者只是个10岁的小男孩，侧面告诉招生官他自幼培养的文学素养。
作者对经典信手拈来的引据十分值得借鉴，不刻意却让人印象深刻。
Midway through my epistle, I decided I was going to use an expression I’d heard a few times, something classy and sophisticated, a turn of phrase that would seal the deal for sure. I thought it carried with it an incredible gravity and deep meaning; I thought it meant ‘you’re my reason for being.’As it turns out, that’s not what “you’re the bane of my existence” meant.
对于作者来说，写诗的过程也是一个探索的过程。作者清晰地描述了自己的心路历程，和对每个表达的精雕细琢。招生官也因此会了解到作者的探索精神。
作者发现问题，解决问题的描写方式值得我们借鉴，这种写法增加了文章的可读性和趣味性。
Since then, I’ve learned to be more cautious when using new terms-but it hasn’t tamed my desire to go to the furthest corners of the English language for the cleverest, the most effective, or the most beautiful rhetoric to suit my purposes. I take joy in using outdated slang like “swell” and “radical,” and enjoy incorporating some of my favorite gimmicks into conversation-ad-libbed alliteration is absolutely an asinine addiction of mine. Funny, rhythmic words like “derring-do” and “rumpy-pumpy” are also guilty pleasures.
写作对作者来说，逐渐成为了享受和获取愉悦的一种来源，对各种俚语（slang）和韵律词（rhythmic words）的列举，在字里行间都体现了作者对语言的热情。招生官对有此等丰富的词汇量和有趣的表达的申请者，也是不得不留下深刻的印象。
当申请者想展示自己的优势时，不妨也参考作者的方式，通过些许精准细节的描写和学术用语的巧妙列举，给人一种通畅并且有说服力的阅读感受。
It’s great to play with words, to weld them together, to mold them into different shapes, to amuse, inspire, and even anger with just the right rhetorical twitch. Instead of writing a paper quickly and going over it several times, I like to craft and re-craft each sentence carefully, specifically, not leaving it until it feels seamless and tuneful, like a smooth melody. My pitch is far from perfect, but I enjoy the art nonetheless.
作者进一步的表述自己在文字世界里遨游和享受，并且精确表述了自己对文字的追求：直到文字像柔和的旋律一样严丝合缝并且精致动听（not leaving it until it feels seamless and tuneful, like a smooth melody）。如果只是草草叙述一个事情的开端、发展与结果，未免过于平淡，而体验和收获是对曾经发生过的事做的最好的总结。
因此，申请者可以在叙事的过程中，适当的加入一点当时的感受和体会，这会使文章内容读起来更丰富些。
There’s no greater thrill to me than a rhetorical crescendo, a triumphant outpouring of words that build on each other, not just nestled together but interwoven with one another, rising, flourishing, and falling. It’s the rush I feel after finishing the careful buildup and jubilantly reaching the punchline the few times I’ve done stand-up comedy, it’s the passion that animates me when I reach the rousing, fist-pounding climax of a political speech (given to either Model Congress delegates or the tiles in my shower), it’s the pleasure of experiencing that one transcendental moment while writing where the words fall into your lap without you having to search.
细细研磨此段，感受作者再一次展现其精彩的文字造诣，并且列举了和其申请的专业相关的演讲经历。这也告诉招生官优异的文学素养不仅仅使他做到妙笔生花，而且他是有能力就读自己所申请的Political Science and Government专业。
结尾升华前文铺垫，着手点题，让招生官明确知道申请者此篇文书的目的，并表现出充分的自信。
I thrive on that. I live on that. And I want to do something with it. The Arab Spring revolts weren’t won in battles but in tweets of 140 characters, and the moon landing was enabled by Kennedy’s speech as much as rockets and gadgetry. Who knows what’s next? I just want to be a part of it.
篇末引出“阿拉伯春天”动乱，表现作者对时事的关心；引出肯尼迪的演讲，寥寥几句，却真实表现其对政治的浓厚的兴趣。
申请美国本科时，与研究生不同，不必浓墨重彩描述对所申请专业的兴趣或者围绕该专业做了具体什么事情，只要凸显出申请者的潜力，在招生官眼里就足够了。即使不是申请政治相关的专业，如果能描述出对时事政治的关心和理解，在招生官眼中也会是加分项。
文书分析总结：
通篇作者的语言都是像诗一样，流畅连贯，思路清晰。全文风格的连贯性对于PS是非常重要的一个要素，因此切忌上段文风活泼，下段严肃。
文书里的逻辑和思路则是对作者的能力与个性做的最好的介绍，因为申请者是要通过PS来为招生官描述最好的自己。
词汇量丰富的同学，可大胆且自信的使用词汇搭配，但是切忌生硬套用，在使用前可对各类短语搭配做些功课，做到自然流畅。对于文笔较好的同学，考究的用词则是加分项，甚至是文书亮点和特色。
最后，小编要替自家小小打个call咯！
MyUniUni符号留学作为全方位国际申请服务平台
始终秉持初心，以服务好学生为首要宗旨
帮助每位学生讲好自己的故事
顺利进入最适合的世界高等学府深造
你的优秀，我们更懂
圆梦藤校，就在“符号”
我们在此，等你来约
来来来，符号君二维码甩出来，
大家随意勾搭，咨询、聊骚，你们开心就好
